Big Bad Arcade Middle-Schoolers
by TheSparkstarScope
Summary: On one night like any other, the two teens from QUILL, Zeno and Gunvolt, found themselves outmatched by the many possible disasters of multiplayer mode. Including a certain infamous hacker. (This was made as a short skit proposal between me and friends in Discord. Canon Zeno needs more relevance, so I should be making more of those. Enjoy! Cover art by Azer.)


**_Disclaimer:_** The "leet speech" included in this fanfiction is a trait of the character, Teseo. Figured I wouldn't have to include this due to Gunvolt fans reading this being already aware of that fact."

* * *

Come onnn, Geeves! You said you'd finally take a day off work, didn't ya?" The usual red spiky hairdo Zeno was dragging Gunvolt, who wore his casual green cloak and glasses, into an arcade. It was roughly one in the morning, yet the bright neon sign above the entrance, flashing the name "Gal's Mighty Guns", indicated that this was much like the famous Sinner's Row: Quiet at day, restless at night.

"Zeno... I know what I said, but I had a tiring day on school." Gunvolt replied, and then yawned afterwards. "I like playing games with you... But why now? It's past midnight." He was definitely tired. Zeno, on the other hand, was as hyped up as ever. "Oi, this place opened just last week! I heard they have the new edition of Magna Armor Wars! Are you going to waste this chance?!" GV didn't even bother replying, and let out an even louder yawn. The redhead dragged him towards the game machines, while still chanting. "I had to pick this time, because it's the calmest time of the house!" And yet it was still crowded. Place sure must be cool, GV considered.

A hour later... "Yeah, yeah! That's what I'm talkin' bout! My Shot Phantom is wrecking!" While Zeno was raking in the tickets on the Magna Armor Wars Z-Cross machine, Gunvolt was dozing off on a bench nearby, yet still trying to keep up with his one yelling teen of a friend. _"Zeno is like a little kid with some games"_ , he thought and couldn't help but to let out a faint chuckle. A few moments after, he spotted another boy, in brown hair and blue headphones, observing. He was quiet, until he approached the machine. "Heeey. Can I join?", the third kid asked. "Yo, go ahead! Almost done with this mission, but there's space for a player two in the next one!" Zeno cheerfully replied, although focused on the game.

At first, Gunvolt didn't notice anything odd, given that he was almost completely asleep, even with the loud noises and game music. But then, Zeno let out a glass-breaking scream that put GV's eyes wide open. " **What?!** How did you catch up to my score so quickly?!", the gaming redhead couldn't let go of how good the newcomer was. "Easy strategy, if you use the Liberty Strike Blade with correct timing and quad dashes", he commented while shrugging, clearly wanting to show off. "Li-liberty Strike?!", Zeno mentioned. "That is cheap as hell! Grab a Magna Armor that doesn't have plot armor, geez!" He definitely wouldn't stop yet. Meanwhile, GV got his eyes on the one with brown hair and headphones. He was wearing a marine blue and gold suit that resembled the likes of the Sumeragi Group way too much, but he couldn't figure out what would they do in a recently open arcade, of all places. So he let the stranger pass. Eventually, he presented himself as Merak, and challenged Zeno to battle.

"L-look at this outrageousness, Gee! He got twice my score in half the time! Get over here and gimme a hand!" Zeno literally yelled at Gunvolt, who slowly walked to the two boys. "I am simply challenging you for a duel", Merak explained. GV was quick to put his hand on his gun pocket... Until he realized that they were talking about the game. Thus, he decided to watch, yawning loudly every minute or so. It was a heated match, however. Their hands aggressively mashed the buttons and moved the joystick to the rhythm of their Armors' moves. GV couldn't close his eyes for a moment.

One to one, three to three... It wouldn't ever end. Every time their time on the machines expired, they just shoved more and more coins in. "Zeno... Where did you get all of those, anyway?" Gunvolt paid attention to the smallest details. "Heh, that's a story for another day, Gee! I'm almost getting rid of this smarty-pants!" And he wasn't. Every time Zeno thought he could pull an easy win, Merak brought out another strategy, and vice-versa. "What, did you just now learn how to quad-dash?", the slothful player spoke with a sarcastic tone. "H-how did you even catch up to my score so quickly, ya brat?!" Zeno was starting to get mad at the taunting. "It's so easy. The Shot Phantom has predictable patterns with that cheap axe, and you didn't even know about the Strike Blade's warphit exploit." Merak was an annoying brat indeed, but he seemed to lose focus easily. The redhead found an easy way to get away with that.

Shortly, a crowd formed around the trio, watching the game and keeping our Geeves from falling asleep. A long series of battles later, Zeno finally beat his opponent, and retrieved the pile of tickets he got from the game. "Aww, yeah, baby! The crowd goes wild as the One-Hit Wonder takes down another one!" Merak, on the other hand, got REALLY mad, to the point of hitting his left hand on the machine, real hard. "You... I will remember your nickname, and I will challenge you for future games!" He walked out of the crowd... Shaking both hands in pain. GV went towards Zeno, almost literally begging. "Can we go home yet...? You've won your tickets and played your game. We can come back on the weekend." But, oh, no, he wasn't done. Zeno was just about to leave with his ticket, when a boy in minty hair, a lab coat and VERY sharp teeth came from behind the machine. "OBJECTION LOLOLOL", he obnoxiously screamed. _"This kid gives me the creeps. Sheesh."_ Zeno was quick to notice that the crowd was giving the newcomer bad looks. "Eye am the king of dis arcade, and eye've put an I on you! See wut I did thereeee?" The boy said, notoriously. "Boi I am Teseo n dis is me domain!" A random kiddo in adult clothing thinking he's ruling the place? Zeno definitely wouldn't let this pass. "Your domain? Well, the challenger now challenges the home team!" He stretched his black fingerless gloves and put his hands back on the Player One controls, ready for another long match. "First to get fifteen points wins it all!" He argued. Gunvolt took note of it and tried to stop him, but it was useless.

"Hahahaha! Shot Phantom?! Srsly?!" The first round had just started and the whiny kid was already taunting. Strangely enough, he chose an underused armor: The Jitsu Astra-EX. "You complain about my choices then pick that?!", Zeno infuriatingly questioned. Teseo was quiet, but had an almost evil grin on his face the entire game. As they played, either he barely had his hands on the controls, or the kid's movements were lightning fast: Zeno lost round one in a matter of seconds. "H-h-how did you use the Astra Edge like that?! That's not possible!" Teseo let out another stupid laugh and replied. "Ez! Ya use da moves n F8 like a pro! LOL!" That only taunted the redhead into doing better and better. But round two, he still lost. It was easy to figure out that this would be very troubling.

About ten matches later... Zeno was losing, eleven to one. He was at a loss for words, the seafoam green creep was good. Gunvolt still wondered how could his friend afford so many coins, if he was missing a lot from his last arcade trip. But they just kept going. "u r just SO BAD", Teseo ranted. "cant even choose a GOOD armor lmao". His controls moved so quickly, Gunvolt wondered. It looked like... _"Wait, isn't that... Septima? Is he an Adept?"_ , GV questioned in his mind. _"He isn't even touching his controls. Dealing with cheaters, huh? Maybe Zeno needs a boost..."_ He approached the machine to the redhead's side, but his eyes wouldn't let go of the brat.

Twelve to one. Gunvolt was convinced. "Hey, Zeno... I think he is cheating with some sort of Septima." GV muttered. "Whatta mean, a hacker slash psychic? Geeves, please, not everything's about-" Zeno replied, but had to cut short. A quick eye on Teseo's controls was all he needed. The weirdo was barely touching them! "Wh-wha-whaaat?! There's a Septima that can do this, Gee?!" He wasn't one for knowledge on Psychics, or anything supernatural, so to say, so Zeno had to rely on GV for that one. "Listen, I think I can give you a boost," the blonde whispered, "But once I do so, this is all you." Small sparks left his left hand as he touched the side of the machine with his palm. The electricity was small and weak enough to not be noticed.

Thirteen to one. Gunvolt was watching with half closed eyes, but the electricity kept on flowing from his hand. Zeno was close to giving up, but once his Shot Phantom loaded in the game, an azure blue glow was radiating from its black and white armaments and wings. Something was wrong, but Teseo was focusing his Septima way too much to notice. GV made a motion for Zeno to continue playing, and that, he did. With a surprise. His armor had obtained electric powers and lightning fast speed. The true battle had just started. The two combatants braced themselves, and continued playing.

"WH4T?! N0!" Thirteen to two. With that one, Teseo noticed that the sudden strength of the Shot Phantom made the difference. Thirteen to three. Zeno was clueless as to what Gunvolt did. But what he did knew was that it was time to earn these tickets. "cheater! CH34T3R!" The brat went on and on. Thirteen to four. Zeno tried to catch up with his armor's movements, proving how quick his hands can get in sight of the upcoming danger. Thirteen to five. "Th-this wont stay like TH1S! :0", Teseo exclaimed, attempting to catch up through the use of tricks with his Hack the Planet Septima, but it was useless. Each trick he's pulled was already known and expected by the now enhanced foe. Except...

Thirteen to fourteen. With bright colors, the quirky gamer caught up and surpassed the bizarre adversary. Gunvolt didn't react but also didn't know what to expect. But neither did either side, or the crowd. The last rounds of that intense competition were then displayed in a large monitor, exhibiting the show to all in the arcade. However, the Serial Experiment pulled one final batch out of his library: He twitched his right eye, and the scenery of the fight had an astounding change from snowy ruins into the inside of a volcano. One wrong touch would burn their armors to bits. The moves of the Jitsu Astra also was enhanced, with a crystal green aura surrounding it. "TH4TS 1T! surrender ALR4RTY!" The screams coming from Teseo were inaudible at that point. "Oversurge! Phantom Soul!" Zeno angrily kept going, sweating bullets. Gunvolt looked surprised at the motivation and the plagiarism of his own catchphrase, but he knew that this was important for his friend. Thus he heightened the boost of the Shot Phantom.

They were at 1 HP each. Suddenly, every fired shot or slash was reflected by the Astra Edge. It had entered a defensive stance, as Teseo hoped that his opponent would approach a lava pool by accident and burn down. But that, he did not. Zeno launched a barrage of attacks, one after the other. However, as obnoxious as the kid was, he sustained a fatal flaw, and was pushed into the lava! He attempted to keep his stance, but Zeno was quick with a final strike: Gatling shots towards the Jitsu, finishing it off with a charged Beam Axe Swing. Teseo was left in shock, that combo had only recently been used once in a worldwide tournament! He fell to his knees in sight of his armor exploding. The screen flashed the message "The1Hit-Wonder wins!", and an absurd burst of tickets came out of the machine. Zeno lifted his arms in celebration, as GV raised an eyebrow and smiled. He let go of the machine to join the party. But... The redhead fainted. He fell face first. "N-no!" His blonde friend was quick to catching him up.

. . .

 ** _Beep! Beep!_**

"GASP! I WON!" Zeno woke up in a rush with the noise of an alarm clock. "... Wait, whuh..." It was 7:00 AM. He found himself resting on a familiar couch. A set of firearms - guns, rifles, etc - was hanging on a wall, with a TV in front of it. It was exhibiting the news. "Oh, you're awake!" His friend Gunvolt came from the kitchen of that apartment. He was holding a frying pan with eggs and bacon on it, and wearing a white apron over his clothes. "Oww, my head... Yo Geeves, what happened?" Zeno had his left hand on his head all the time during this conversation. "Quite the explosive night, wasn't it?" Gunvolt smiled. "You fell unconscious, so I called a taxi. Good work." He went back in the kitchen, leaving the redhead with the TV once more.

"Aww, man... Wait! The tickets! Did ya grab 'em?" Zeno almost bursted, but GV rushed into his room without the pan and apron. "I did even better", he says as he walks back in the living room with a large box that said _"Shot Phantom Ultra-MG Model"._ Zeno's mouth opened. "I heard you were wanting to buy this one all month. It costed all tickets but-" Gunvolt tried to explain, before being interrupted by a scream. "AAAAAGGGH! No, no, no! That's the Ultra-MG! I was going to get the Alta-AG! Curses, Geeves! Why are you so cruel?! It was all I wanted this month! Nooooo..." He laid down on the couch and sobbed. Gunvolt felt very awkward, observing the scene. "Er... Ehehe, we can return there next week." Gunvolt was scratching his head, smiling nervously. He knew he was in for another _looong_ night.


End file.
